Parents: Why are you so paranoid?

My mom is paranoid, my 11 year old sister can't go anywhere by herself. She can only go two houses down both ways. It sucks. My mom acts like people are just plotting to kidnap her.



In the meanwhile I'm at Target and I see three boys. I know two of them because their older brother goes to my highschool. Anyways, they are 10 and 8, the other kid looked maybe 10, they are just chilling in Target eating little ceasers pizza and chatting it up. On my way out I see them get on their bikes. I say "you're TJ's little brother huh?" to the older kid. He says "yeah" I ask "Don't you guy's live way by the beach?" He says "yeah, my mom lets me go where ever as long as I tell her" So I giggle and say "where are you going now." He says "Sports Authority, I need to buy a new net and Targets has gay ones" Then they get on and ride off. Having the entire city to explore.



And btw their older brother is probably the most successful story at our school. He's going to ASU next year to play football. He was recruited heavily by so many schools UCLA, USC, Washington, Texas, Florida etc. Supposedly his little brothers are better than him at that age plus they are all really smart so save the "bad parenting" because I doubt your kids will reach their success.Parents: Why are you so paranoid?
Here's the thing. The media has bombarded us, as parents, with a sh!tstorm of stories about kidnapping. Every time it happens we hear about it. It gives them great ratings because its so scary. It leads to people thinking that this is a common occurrence because we're seeing it often on TV.

Even twenty years ago when I was 10 my mother would let us go outside and cruise all over our neighborhood on our bikes all day. Our friends joined us. Every. Single. One. It just wasn't a fear parents had back then if you lived in a good area. Nowadays the media and society in general has completely sucked the fun out of being a parent. We cant just enjoy ourselves as parents. If its not kidnapping, its disease, or CPS taking our kids for simple discipline observed by some uptight freak.

Really what it boils down to is that our children are everything to us. If something happened to you your parents would be emotionally devastated. It makes us extremely easy targets for fear-mongers looking to profit from scaring us sh!tless. It sucks because the world is no more dangerous now than it was 20 years ago. In actuality crime has dropped. It just doesnt appear that way because the news we recieve is filtered through a negative lens. Apparently humans love watching tragedy.

Even though I understand whats happening and how my thoughts have been manipulated by skewed information I still struggle to let my kids have more free reign. I have to conciously make myself let go. I know that if I shelter my kids too much I'll smother them and stunt their growth. I dont want that. I try to find a happy medium.

The fear of losing your child is powerful, powerful stuff. The moment I laid eyes on my children I was ready to die for them if needed. The experience is unique to having a child, its tough to understand it if you dont have perspective. I gave it my best shot here. I hope it helps.Parents: Why are you so paranoid?
Your parents are right; and a ten year old should not be a loud to run around buying things and should not be calling things "gay." That is bad parenting; my parents are like that and don't say I won't reach success because I have a 4.6 gpa average. Oh, and by the way - some "smart" doesn't make homophobic comments and run around like pedophile targets.
What on earth do you think being allowed to wander round a city has to do with grades and football skills? It's bad parenting. Eight and ten is far too young to be doing this.



"save the "bad parenting" because I doubt your kids will reach their success."



They already surpassed it. Sorry, sweetie.Parents: Why are you so paranoid?
I'm 16 and have never gone anywhere with a friend. Neither have slept over or been to another friends house. My parents are strict to the extreme.

Maybe since I'm an only child?

Oh well, I'm moving out at 18 anyways. Muahaha.
because they love you and even if they are over protective they don't want anything to happen to you or your sister it may get annoying just remember they do it because they love you.Parents: Why are you so paranoid?
ur mom is right..ur a kid too! one day ur gonna grow up and know how it works in real life.
your mom wants to be a good parent, my mom was the same. The world is dangerous out there and some people just don't realize it or think that the dangers won't affect their children. Honestly if I had kids I wouldn't let them go that far on their own either, you never know what can happen to them. There are crazy people out there that go after kids. You try to use only one example of two younger kids on their own as a basis of how all kids should be, you can't form an opinion off of just TWO kids. Some parents just don't want to do their job as parents, I know I would.

You know what? I rather be with my kid than let them be alone and it has nothing to do with media. I see kids by themselves and I shake my head at parents that would just let their kids wonder off. You say how there was a time when kids did things they don't do now, but do you realize times have changed, things are different. We can't live in the past, we look to the future. Also it was safer for children back in the day as well. I am not a parent, but I would want to keep my kids safe. You seem to not understand how your mom thinks. She loves you and your sister, she isn't being paranoid, even if she is, I'd say APPRECIATE that she CARES for you.
I think as long as you know where your children are, it's fine. Go with a group of friends at a mall for a few hours, not a bad thing. Parents nowadays are too strict, keep their children inside and say you can't go anywhere. I was kept inside, my mom VERY strict. Guess what? Once I turned 18, I got married. I don't regret it, I love my husband to death, but I seriously wish I didn't feel so obligated to do something like that. I wouldn't take it back, but seriously, I didn't grow up correctly, I wasn't allowed at sleepovers, I wasn't allowed at friends houses, I wasn't allowed to the mall without her by my side. Meanwhile, my friends parents were the complete opposite of strict, letting them smoke and drink.

I believe there is a middle ground, know where you children are, tell them what they can and cannot do, and let them explore and make mistakes, let them mature. Nothing wrong with letting your children go out for a few hours, let them breathe. If you expect everything from your child, shouldn't they expect something back?

It's funny though that people think they are better because they are strict, they are pretty much as bad as someone allowing their child to drink. It's still pushing them in the wrong direction.

My husband was allowed to go anywhere, and he had 4.0 GPA, great grades, and he didn't ever get himself into trouble. I did the same, but what he had was more experience and fun while what I had was boredom. I even started to CUT myself because I was depressed, at least until I met him.

You gotta let kids experience, seriously. Lots of parents think their child is so "special" and "cute" and that they will get kidnapped. It's so stupid.